I'm throwing a special picnic in my backyard this Memorial Day weekend. What should I wear as the hostess? Do you have any tips for dressing up my backyard, too?
—Deborah P., Winter Park, Florida

Even though I—ahem—have yet to receive an invite—ahem, ahem—I take great delight in offering you my advice. I'll tackle your backyard decor later. First, your outfit.

Women do not wear dresses as often as they should. This is an empirical fact you'll find in any decent scientific journal. Treat yourself to a dress—but a comfortable one, and one that doesn't break the bank. You may have your heart set on that to-die-for floor-length McQueen. But you will be running around serving food, after all, and if you get a spill on it you shouldn't have to feel heartbroken.

No, Gap has a $70 dress that will let you stay comfortable while you charm your guests with a gorgeous, soft purple color. And it's machine washable. Or try their tiered halter dress that's on sale for as little as $19.99.

Finally, round it out with a flat espadrille or decent flip-flop. No heels if you're skittering about on grass—and Havaianas are not cool for a smartly dressed hostess—and you're good to go.

I'm quite tired of tiki torches, despite their fabulously low prices and their special way of adding that Brady Bunch-in-Hawaii feel to any outdoor space. But don't put them in the same category as paper lanterns, which can be stacked or strung up in a thousand different ways. (Martha Stewart stacks 14-inchers on sticks several feet high and lines up the light towers in rows. The effect is stunning.)

But that's her thing. My thing is recessionomics writ large. Got an herb garden? No? Got a supermarket? Good. Fill up on Crate & Barrel bud vases (you can't say no to decor pieces that are less than three bucks each) and instead of flowers, fill each vase with fresh herbs of varying heights and lengths. Fill each vase with water just like you would with flowers—and send guests home with the edible centerpieces at the end of the night. (Don't think you can find enough herbs? Got a lavender bush in your neighborhood? You're welcome.)

If you can track down low-lying square vases, blow your guests' minds by filling them with upright, densely packed haricot verts (yes, string beans, really), well-trimmed asparagus of uniform length, or radishes with bulbs down at the bottom, the leafy foliage still waving proudly on top. Fill the vases halfway up with water and they'll look like high-end centerpieces that some TV decorator thought up. I promise. And your guests will think you're some sort of raging genius.

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